well..here it comes.

25 dayss.

till,
well,

Floridaa (:

I'm really excited and now just because were going to florida and i'm gonna be around my best friends. Its because were going to serve others. give up ten days of our vacation to help others in need. To serve the lord. I could not be more excited about that factor of the trip.

I love my youth group with all my heart, don't get me wrong, but everyone knows that were gonna be in arguements from day one, because thats just how it goes. I love them to death , but the drama in our group is insane. Oh well, we must take the good with the bad and love it all the same.

<3

taking the high road.

turn that frown upside down.

25 days of school left. June 3rd.

Well technically it all ends on the 29th of May, but we have finals the 1st 2nd and 3rd. So i'll only be there for a few days.

So I thought since the school years coming to an end, I'll right a bit about my favorite classes.


I think my favorite class all togther has been English, Ms. Lemick is one of the very best teachers I've ever had, she explains things in a way no other teacher has. Her brutal honesty and bluntness has made that class the best her love for literature and telling the story behinde it, made the year much more enjoyable. She teaches not only english but also life lessons and the deeper meaning of things and that is why Ms. Lemick was my favorite class this year.

My 2nd favorite was Mrs. Fetty Physical Science. Mrs. Fetty was just a good person all around and Science is always one of my favorite subjects, her teaching style was easy for my too understand and she related well to her students.

My freshman year has been remarkable and openend my eyes. Its the begging of the end. I'll soon be out of primary school and on to the 11-16 years it takes to get a medical degree. This year has left alot to consider and showed me that I can't just take the easy road anymore.

bittersweet.

Your my indian summer in the middle of this cold harsh ohio winter.

I wish I could show you just how much I care for you, the way you look at me is something I can't replace.

The way you walk and talk, the way your arms come around me just when I need it. You pull me down so hard and pull me right back up. Your the balace I need in my life. Your quite when I'm loud. Your calm when I'm freaking out. I can't even begin to explain the way I feel about you. It all seems like not enough. Everyword you speak to me just makes my day so much better.


Your this feeling I can't describee.

looking foward.

These months can't move fast enough for me.
I'm ready for spring to be here and april.

Freshman year coming to a close is going to be bitter sweet, its like the begging of the end. I dread the next three years, but then i relize, wait thats it. no more easy.

Then i really start to think, what am I gonna do?

College? Military? Work?

How am I gonna get the money for college? What if I don't pass the OGT? I'm not smart enough for college, I'm barley smart enough to get past freshman classes?

I don't take orders well, so does that mean the military isn't an option? How does the military even work? Don't they pay for school?

Even if I can get a job out of high school, its gonna be a crappy minum wadge job, won't it? What happens when I'm 30 and I have kids and need a good paying job?


I don't know where to start, life is no more than choices anymore. I wish these things could be easier, I wish that I had someone to do all the work for me. I wish I could get over my stubborness.

Where to begin....?

sick.

i've been sick since friday.

I almost died saturday working concessions.

i've only been to the first two periods of the day all week.

I feel like I'm gonna cough up my lungs.

I can't breath through my nose.

I hate being sick.

I've read all the twilight books. twice. in a weeks time.

the end.

often.

You would call and I would answer, you would yearn for me, your handiwork
Job 14:15

Psalm 84:2
My soul yearns, even faints, for the courts of the LORD; my heart and my flesh cry out for the living God.

Romans 6:6
For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body of sin might be done away with that we should no longer be slaves to sin.

Job 19:27
I myself will see him with my own eyes—I, and not another. How my heart yearns within me!



I constantly think I have the answer to my questions then it hits me, that I don't and it will be years before I ge the answer to most of my questions.

My stubborness tends to override most of my thoughts that are correct. I often find my self going to other people for help, then today..in english...i know a werid place to relize this. That I shouldn't be going to other people for help, but to god.

I think the most stubborn of my thoughts has been that god does not want to know me, which when I found the verse Job 14:15 I was mistaken and for a moment taken by surprise, how could something so great so wonderful want to know something like me, a sinful humane? then I came across Romans 6:6 and relized that I am new, I am not who I was. I am who I am.



oh, the cliche is all of this.

to thy i cry,,,

"Lord I want to yearn, I want to burn with Passion"

I was listening to Shane and Shane and that lyric really caught my eye, it describes how I've felt lately, I feel the need to be closer with god, I am yearning to be closer to him, its like an empty feeling in my heart. I want to show passion, I want everyone around me to know who I am passionate about.

You would call and I would answer, you would yearn for me, your handiwork
Job 14:15